The Hummingbird Bully & Our HUMAN Heart

Outside the breakfast room window on the balcony of my parents’ Colorado house is a hummingbird feeder. It’s fascinating to watch how quickly those tiny birds can suck down the sugar water. Even more fascinating was watching the one hummingbird who wanted it all to himself. We called him the Bully. Interestingly, he was also the most beautiful, with a vibrant neon orange neck.

I was curious about his behavior so I asked ChatGPT and learned he was not an anomaly. Apparently, it’s common for a hummingbird to assert himself as king.

From what we observed he would sit on a nearby branch guarding the feeder. Any time other hummingbirds approached, he would swoop down using his fluttering wings and long beak to block them from accessing the feeder. He would continue doing this until he had chased away all other birds threatening to take his sugar water.

He wanted it all for himself as if there wasn’t enough to go around. His selfishness was ridiculous. But can’t we be just like that?

Living out of a scarcity mindset as if someone else’s good is a threat to ours.

Take teenage girls for example.

A girl who is beautiful, talented, popular, or simply comfortable in her own skin can become a threat to another girl—not because she has actually taken anything from her, but because her presence awakens the fear that there isn’t enough room for both of them to shine.

So the exclusion begins—The whispering. The rumors. The group chat without her. It’s all an attempt to dismiss her in order to elevate self.

“If I can make her less popular, maybe I won’t have to question my place.”

“If I can diminish her confidence, maybe I’ll feel more confident.”

It’s the hummingbird at the feeder. If there is only enough for one of us, I’d better make sure it’s me.

But it’s not just teenage girls, is it? Sadly, we don’t necessarily outgrow this as adults. We might just get better at disguising it.

· Someone loses weight.

· Builds a successful business or following.

· Keeps everyone at the table laughing with her stories.

· Has a marriage that seems perfect, and young adult children who are flourishing.

Instead of simply celebrating, we compare. Somehow what they have diminishes how we feel about ourselves. And their blessing makes us wonder if God has forgotten us.

But we are the ones who have forgotten what’s true—living as though life is one hummingbird feeder with limited supply of goodness. That’s the lie of scarcity.

That’s not who God is.

“But God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which he loved us, even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ—by grace you have been saved—and raised us up with him and seated us with him in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, so that in the coming ages he might show the immeasurable riches of his grace in kindness toward us in Christ Jesus.”

- Ephesians 2:4-7

Everything God has done for his Son, he has done for us—we have been made alive, raised us up and seated with him!

There is nothing that can give us more security than knowing we have a place at his table. This is a place of belonging. A place of rest.

We don’t have to prove ourselves, grasp for significance, or fear someone else’s blessing. In Christ, we have been given “every spiritual blessing” (Ephesians 1:3). We have been redeemed and his abundant grace towards us will never run out.

The more we believe this, the less threatened we become by the gifts, beauty, or success of others. Comparison begins to loosen its grip. Jealousy gives way to gratitude. Scarcity gives way to abundance.

We can trust that our Father is not stingy with His children. His goodness to us doesn’t lessen every time he blesses someone else. His loving-kindness has no end.

Our seat is secure. And someone else’s seat has no bearing on ours.

The hummingbird guards the feeder, afraid another bird might take what it believes is scarce.

Because of Jesus, we don’t have to compete and compare.

We can live out of our security. We can rejoice with those who rejoice. Give thanks for what God has entrusted to us. And we can rest in the abundance of a Father who has already given us everything we truly need.